Sexual Addiction (take 4)

When you’re within the grasp of addiction, you’re in the habit of feeling a certain type of high. What you’re seeking is to feel a specific way. What you’re trying to get away from is the feeling associated to “nothingness” or “numbness”. Essentially, we seek a heightened state in contrast to feeling low or unemotional. We fear flatlining, because that would equal being dead. We think we need to feel more, when in fact we just need a break from our routine.

After having studied TCM and the laws of trophology, enzymes, and the bodily organs,
I’ve come to believe that what we feel is related to our health. And our health is affected by what and how we eat. Obviously stress can come into play, but stress can only pressurise what is there. If you stress toothpaste out of a tube, it’s because there is toothpaste to stress out. Similarly, when we’re under stress, what comes out of us is related to the degree of health we have. More precisely, when we are under stress, our organs strive to produce specific results under that intensity.

So, wear and tear of our kidneys, our liver, our pancreas and so on over time leads to a lesser output. Because, on a daily basis, we eat foods our body isn’t adapted to consume. This leads to weakened organs, which in turn leads to lesser states of being.

For example, if we constantly eat sugars to get highs, our body becomes accustomed to these sugars for getting high. Over time, this weakens organs in the body, which then produce lesser energy. Then our brains accountant kicks in, let’s call him Mr. Allostasis.
Mr.A, takes stock of the current situation and counts how many energy coins we have and can produce. If we’re already at a limit, he’ll recommend that we listen to our body and rest.

Except, our daily habits revolve around being productive. So we down one or two cups of coffee and we force the body into overdrive, we essentially overclock our rhythm until the coffee runs out. Then we’re back to feeling low. To counterbalance this low, we then grab some carbs or sugars “because I need energy“. And continue depleting our body from functioning correctly. We repeat this day in and day out, until we reach burnout, overeat and end up obese or worse.

This brings me to inflammation. We essentially are irritated due to the foods we eat. If what we are eating isn’t compatible with our body we disregard it often and link it to a bug, indigestion or the quality of that food, rather than the type of food itself. And again, we continue the vicious cycle of depletion while over stimulating our pancreas and kidneys.

This inflammation leads to urges. It’s a silent discomfort which roams quietly. Until we need to rest. Then, when time comes for us to rest, we’re uncomfortable, we feel guilty for not being as productive as the rest of society, and associate being weak or low to being discarded by the tribe (the rest of society). Which in turn propagates the need to feel a high in order to retrieve a feeling of power (over our fleeting life).

Once the high achieved, we then experience a low because we’ve once again depleted the body of its essential nutrients for functioning. What do we do? We look for some quick fix.
We rummage the cupboards for sugar, or a bun, anything to numb that inner feeling which is now associated to an elevated heart rate and a new degree of anxiety.

The anxiety comes from Mr.Allostasis sounding the alarm-bell, telling us that we need to rest because our nutrient stock is low and any activity will only worsen our energetic state.

Too often, its not that we are affraid to be addicted, but we’re affraid to heal. Because that would mean we have power, we are responsible, we can change our life and we need to leave our comfort zone…

I will post solutions to this in another post on diet, routine and mindset.

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